Having a baby and worried about stepkids, where can I get some advice?

I'd appreciate some advice from people who have experienced this situation before with similar aged kids. Ours are both girls aged 11 %26amp; 13. Their mother is still in the picture with a shared care arrangement (50% contact) and they do have a positive relationship with me as their Step-parent.Having a baby and worried about stepkids, where can I get some advice?
Wellll... as a daughter of divorced parents and younger step siblings (10 and 12 year difference) I can tell you I did not really get along with my step dad until they had kids together. I LOVE LOVE my step brother and sister and always have. If anything brought me closer to my step dad it was loving his and my mom's kids. You may be surprised that it actually works to bring the family together. As long as you take the time to appreciate them and their part in your child's life. I am 34 now and still have a close and loving relationship with all involved.


Good luck!Having a baby and worried about stepkids, where can I get some advice?
Have the stepkids act like they aren't. If they were your children you would have them involved every step of the way. (it sounds like you already are involved with them) Anyways, let them help out with names, decorating the nursery, and anything else they show an interest in. I would also just keep saying your brother or sister...., without mentioning anything about him or her being half. I think the most important thing comes after the baby comes. Make sure that if you spend 100 dollars on the baby for christmas, that is what you spend on each of the daughters. If you buy the baby new toys, buy the daughters something. If you take the baby to the zoo, invite the daughters (i think you have the idea) The worse thing to do would be not to treat the daughters like they were own.., especially with a new baby to take daddy's attention.
Let them know that they will be having a little brother or sister who will live with you and daddy all the time, explain to them that their mummy is theirs they dont have to share their time with her and you are there for them when they need it.


Let them be a part of the process, go shopping with you, look at your ultrasound pictures and have their own time with you and the baby when its born.


You could have the most wonderful reltionship with these girls and they could be great with helping you out!
Get them involved in the birth taking them to your doc appointments, to your ultasound, and make big sister shirts and other gear. If they feel they are not forgoten they will embrace this new little one coming into their lives!!!!!!


Good Luck and hope this helps


Brandy